permission to choose the easy option

the ease of lowering your expectations

Last week, in my weekly five ways to practise simplicity post, I suggested that eggs on toast may be the perfect mid-week dinner to add to your meal plan - for both ease and thriftiness. I had so many people message to thank me for the suggestion and now I’m just a bit confused.

When did eggs become a revolutionary dinner option?

I can presume it’s because our expectations have become unrealistically high. But that’s just silly considering we’re all here living ordinary lives; hitting snooze on the alarm, thinking about the washing that needs to be hung out, juggling to maintain some semblance of order - in our homes and in our minds.

Just this afternoon the wind picked up and with it came the cool south-west air. I’ve just put wool socks on my feet and I’ve slipped a jumper over my cotton dress. Is this true autumn?

The leaves are starting to tinge, some are already blushing red. I’m noticing these subtle changes because micro-seasons tell me a lot about where I live and this informs how I live. It’s one way I pay attention; by walking on the same path every day and noting the tiny shifts; contraction and expansion, colour and shade, moon and tide.

Everything changes.

I’ve been following a few money-focused accounts on instagram, mostly for the budgeting tips but also because peeking into other people’s finances is intriguing (guilty pleasure). I’m bemused when people leave comments criticising ‘no-spend weeks’ - Live a little! they say. Life’s too short to not treat yourself!

I’m all for treats but I also think we’ve collectively reached the point where we’re chasing the icing on the cake every day. No longer are we savouring the simple; we’re skipping over the good stuff because we’re distracted by what’s most alluring. And it’s being normalised because ‘treat’ has become an umbrella term for everything from a pastry with your coffee to weekends in fancy hotels on a whim.

Suggesting eggs for dinner is actually permission to choose the easy, un-fancy option. It’s recognition of the fact that most of us are trundling along in the mediocre middle and wondering: what will I cook for dinner tonight? This got me thinking about how far we’ve stretched our expectations of normal life and how detrimental this is to our understanding of who we are and what we ‘should’ be doing each day.

We’ve forgotten about the goodness of the normal stuff like simple food. By this I mean: use what you’ve got, make soup, rustle together a meal of sorts or call it what it is: a collection of things on a plate. This has always been a hit with my kids, in part because of the novelty I’m sure (consider this a parenting tip, if you like).

Comparison is a normal human tendency but never before have we had such prolific insight into others’ lives. It’s very likely that you feel like you’re falling behind because you’re right, it seems like there’s many people out there enjoying abundant success in all its forms; it’s easy to feel like you’re procrastinating, stagnant or yearning - in life and in creativity.

Is this why we’re always questioning our worth? Am I doing enough, being enough, is my work good enough? And when the questioning continues we easily start to chase what’s next — the bigger and better — and in the process we skip over what’s good in this very moment.

Gosh, chasing is tiring. If you’re anything like me, perhaps you’re thinking about how to live with more ease and be okay with what is. This is a life-long practice. And it’s very real work; the checking-in, the mulling and middling as you do more laundry and reply to the email and pay the bills and ask yourself: is this how I want to live?